so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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