Buhtt sex?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
