The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
