don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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