STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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