If i come over, it means nothing
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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