halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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