those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize