Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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