im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
