1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.