I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!