I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
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