you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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