He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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