If i could tip my vagina, i would.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize