So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize