Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
