yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
