So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
