found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
No subtext here. People are naked.
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Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
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It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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