these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
