i already hear my dad disowning me
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
