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My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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