I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Randomize
