this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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