'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
