Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my parents said I crawled through the house
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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