Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
