So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
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It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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