If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
