Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
