You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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