it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
