I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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