Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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