I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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