Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
