My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize