My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
