Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
