i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
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