listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
