There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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