dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
