I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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