Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
