We're like a lot better than the average bears
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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