Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
We had sex on a dog bed..
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
