i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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