i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
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easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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