If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
