i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
where does the pee come out of this thing
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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